If you had five billion you could hop from job to job, calling entitled customers idiots all across your city, putting the fear of You into every shithead in town until people become afraid to be rude to servers and cashiers, lest you emerge from the back room like some kind of manners-enforcing specter

If I had $5 billion I could shop at stores and heckle customers all I want. And tip waitresses $1000 whenever I go out to eat. And if I see a fellow customer at said dining establishment I’ll pay their bill if they’re polite to the wait staff.

Then there’s starting my own business and being a nice employer. -Abby